Dora Beig - Dora Gaizutis : The Moon Has Now Eclipsed the Sun

View Larger Map
"When we chase our dreams, often we encounter a nightmare." - John Sanidopoulos

"It is not good to give oneself ease in life. They who seek this live for themselves and not God, for such a person cannot cut off their will." - St. Barsanuphios the Great

"People want their freedom and happinness. Why? So that they may be slaves to their own passions." - Gerontissa Gavrilia

"What does it profit a man if he gain the whole world and lose his own soul?" - Jesus

"Remembrance of wrongs is the consummation of anger, the keeper of sin, hatred of righteousness, ruin of virtues, poison of the soul, worm of the mind, shame of prayer… You will know that you have completely freed yourself of this rot, not when you pray for he person who has offended you, not when you exchange presents with him, not when you invite him to your table, but only when, on hearing that he has fallen into bodily or spiritual misfortune, you suffer and weep for him as for yourself." – St. John Climacus, The Ladder of Divine Ascent

"The more you draw near to God, the more mightily the enemy pursues you." - St. Parfeny Of Kiev Caves

‎"No sinner can escape future judgment without experiencing in this life either voluntary hardships or afflictions he has not chosen." - St. Maximos the Confessor

"If you are not willing to die for your God and your brothers, at a moment's notice or by a thousand cuts and sacrifices over many years, then you do not have a religion. You have a hobby." - G.K. MacBrien

"It's amazing how someone can break your heart, but you still love them with all the little pieces."

"In our days marriages come and go, but divorces last forever."

"When love is not madness, it is not love." - Pedro Calderon de la Barca

"The purer the heart is, the larger it is, and the more able it is to find room within it for a greater number of beloved ones; while the more sinful it is, the more contracted it becomes, and the less number of beloved can it find room for, because it is limited by self-love, and that love is a false one." - St. John of Kronstadt

"These six things the Lord hates,
Yes, seven are an abomination to Him:
A proud look,
lying tongue,
hands that shed innocent blood,
a heart that devises wicked plans,
feet that are swift in running to evil,
a false witness who speaks lies, and
one who sows discord among brethren." - Solomon in Proverbs 6:16-19

'Beloved, if any one says, "I love God,"
and hates his brother, he is a liar;
for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen,
cannot love God whom he has not seen.
And this commandment we have from him,
that he who loves God should love his brother also.' - Jesus in 1 John 4:20-21

"Don't justify your sins and weaknesses, but see yourself as you really are. And especially, love one another." - Fr. Seraphim Rose

"The passing of time does not cover past sins, but only forms the foundation for greater sins. Humble repentance and the willful acceptance of suffering brings God's grace to cover our sins and wipe them clean." - John Sanidopoulos

"Bring more evils upon them, O Lord, bring more evils upon them that are glorious on earth." - Prophet Isaiah

(Watch Aesop's Fable here)

Why Women Should Feel Sorry For Guys

Marriage and our Inaccurate Conceptions



The following are notes for a future book:

In my last talk with Dora in July 2006 I quoted to her Matthew 7:20 to show her that her divorce cannot be justified because its fruit bore only evil over the previous two years since her separation. These are the verses in context.

Matthew 7:16-20

Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles?

Even so every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit.

A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit.

Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire.

Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them.

What fruits did I refer to and what have I noticed since then? Here is a brief list:

1. She based her divorce on lies created in her mind, and possibly which she convinced herself were true though in fact they weren't. Examples: A.) She claimed to have been manipulated into her marriage when in fact she chose it with much enthusiasm and no manipulation was ever involved; B.) She claimed her husband abused her and cheated on her when in fact no abuse ever took place nor adultery of any kind that would in any way justify a divorce, but rather she was always considered by her husband as his princess and the apple of his eye and never even started an argument with her nor argued with her when she would. If abuse were ever to be claimed, her husband has every right to accuse her of being abusive on a mental, verbal and emotional level, though never did; C.) Her most absurd self-justification, as if the others were not absurd enough, was accusing her husband of being controlling. The fact is that never did her husband tell her what to do and even allowed her the freedom to do whatever she wanted, within reason. Only two times in the marriage were there objections to her behavior (both within the last six months prior to their separation): first when she tried to hire a male stripper for her homosexual co-worker's birthday which she was coordinating behind my back and not being honest about, and second when she stayed out with her much younger friends at a bar till 3:00AM and had to be driven home by a stranger because she was so drunk while I was home worrying about her. D.) The older she got, the greedier she became. Despite the fact that her husband worked a full time job and was a full time student and they lived in a free and pleasant apartment in one of the best areas of Boston, Dora was never satisfied. She had white picket fence dreams and wanted her husband to work two full time jobs while he was also a full time student. Her husband even offered to quite school to please her, but she would not have it and instead decided to just look upon him as a failure and unworthy of her ("I'm too good for you" she told me, "I was a crazy to think you were a catch."). E.) As for her husband trying to end every argument by the end of each day, he did this based on Holy Scripture where it says "let not the sun go down while you are angry" (Ephesians 4:26) because this is a sin and could lead to great regret. By her husband trying to help resolve her anger before the end of the night, she saw this as "controlling" and thus a justification of her divorce. Before he started doing this, after a stupid argument she ended up not talking to him for three days, and another time he allowed her to walk out of the house angry and she did not return for twelve hours forcing her husband to call for help in searching for her since she had the only car they possessed at the time. And after every argument, she would apologize because she knew she was wrong for being uncompromising (as evidenced by the passionate make-up sex)...and her attitude never allowed for any positive changes to help in the relationship.

2. She put no effort in preserving her marriage, but left with anger and hatred towards her husband based on her false demonization of him to justify her desires expressed on the night she left him ... at 2:00AM I might add. What were these desires she expressed? First she wanted to drink more and be around people that liked to drink alcohol as much as she did, and second she wanted to explore her sexual desires since she felt she was hitting her sexual peak despite her very sexual relationship with her husband. Her shamelessness and cruelty was best expressed when she told her husband after she wanted a divorce: "I don't love you anymore...I love Jason Varitek" as she held her hands to her heart.

3. She spread lies to her family and friends to gain sympathy for herself after the separation, and did this by demonizing her husband to justify to others and herself her divorce. By this, she gained the support of all, except from those who knew the truth and who knew her husband.

4. Following her separation she constantly hung around people ten years or so younger than her and not a few homosexuals, and all they did was drink and go to parties where men would constantly try to get something off her. One time her husband even found a condom in her car when he went to pick something up and she said it belonged to one of her friends, and another time he found the same brand condom (that hardly fit around his thumb I might add) in her purse which she accidentally left in her car. When her husband asked her about it, she accused him of stealing it in order to use it for himself (did I mention it hardly fit around his thumb?).

5. She would constantly, even on weekdays, hang out at a dive bar called Triple D's to drink cheap beer and seduce the bartender Mike (who was from Ireland and an illegal alien). One night her husband saw her aggressively and sexually push Mike into the bathroom and through the window he heard nothing but kissing and laughing. For calling her out on her behavior to bring her back to her senses, she refused to talk to him and instead had her husband receive a restraining order. She cried that night not for her sin, but for my interruption. The height of her madness!

6. While on a restraining order she continued her adultery (she was not yet divorced at the time) with the illegal Irish bartender and they would alternate sleeping over each others apartments. Meanwhile she would deny this to her husband, which prompted him to find out the truth for himself. He saw with his own eyes them making out and hugging for a long time, and lighting candles and playing soft music in his bedroom (no window curtains). This was about all her husband could take to watch on a continual basis, giving him many a sleepless night as he would go to the local chapel praying for her for hours (the same chapel they fell in love in where they prayed nightly while friends, but she stopped because she decided she was too busy to pray). Even at her apartment he would see them smoking cigarettes on her roof and laughing at her weeping husband, who was praying for her and sprinking holy water in her car as his only hope. Driving him to a brink of destruction, he would be fired from his jobs and fail his classes, since he was working full time and completing a Master's degree at the same time.

7. Many other things can be said for the first two years of separation, all prior to the divorce. It came to the point where for the sake of his own health and well-being, as well as for his family, as well as for her, that her husband made the decision after much prayer to do everything in his power to get her to leave town. Since he was already demonized, he decided to demonize himself more and look like a mad lunatic by her friends and family to accomplish this (something she already was). It worked, though his intentions were for the best of both of them, an intention she never had even during their marriage since she was very selfish. Once early on in their marriage her husband asked if she prayed for him at all, and she responded that she was too busy praying for herself. Meanwhile her husbands prayers were always either for his wife or for the both of them, and never for himself.

8. In July 2006 she decided to leave Boston and the two had a final dinner. Afterwards they talked for a few hours and her husband even gave her a parting gift. Not the gift he intended to give her (a $10,000 check), but it was a gift nonetheless for her departure. She apologized to her husband and thanked him that night for all he did to force her departure from Boston for the sake of us both. I actually had a sparkle of hope for her, but boy was I wrong. When he called her out on her behavior over the previous two years that night and his desire that she not continue it, she denied that she ever slept or even kissed the bartender or anyone else for that matter ... not even masturbated (which she again blamed on me, which showed just how stupid she was). When I told her what I saw with my own eyes she wept and said sorry though still denied everything (a complete lunatic of contradictions and a liar!). As a Christian I hugged her to comfort her (fool that I am) and we shared mutual tears (hers must have been fake), but she never admitted to her wrong doings. The next day Dora drove back to Ohio and she called me at work telling me she was leaving, but I was busy and told her to call me back in a few weeks to tell me how she was. She said she would in a friendly way. I had hoped we could be friends. They never talked again.

9. Six months passed before her husband tried to contact her again. He wrote her a letter but it went unanswered. He tried once more a few months later, but this time it was returned to him. Assuming it was her parents who did this, he sent it to her brother. She replied with a very mean-spirited letter to leave her alone and to stop making her miserable. The letters had no such intention (though they were full of lies in order to get some reaction from her), but she threatened me with police action if I ever contacted her again. So much for her being a repentant Christian. Obviously this was influenced by her parents and siblings, to whom she demonized me. I was informed they had threatened to disown and disassociate themselves from Dora if she ever contacted me again. This is clearly the work of demons, for whom her family is easy prey.

10. Eventually I found out from someone who contacted me (a man Dora screwed over big time) that her evil fruits continued. I was told she never moved to Ohio but went to California to live with her sister Clara and her boyfriend Dan in Dublin. She got a job as an elementary school teacher and was making about $50,000 a year. Despite the large amount of money, she never once offered to pay rent or help out financially for living in a home payed for by Clara's boyfriend. She lived there for about a year. Within a month or so living in California she met a dentist (quick work for a whore). In her growing greediness she decided to use him for certain favors and give sexual favors in return. She used him to escape from living at Clara's house every day and would stay there 3 or 4 times a week, and she would also get her teeth fixed for free. She had about $10,000 worth of fixing, which I found to be ironic since the gift her husband wanted to give her but she refused before she left Boston (without knowing what the gift was) was a check for $10,000. After a few months and her teeth were all fixed, she dumped the dentist because he was "too boring" for her, yet he asked for a last sexual adventure and was refused. The only time in the past few years anyone ever observed Dora in church was that Christmas in the Cathedral of the Annunciation in Oakland, but it did not continue, as expected. This is because it is impossible to reconsile her evil behavior with anything holy. Her greed continued however when she would go home and conving her mother of her poverty to grab her credit card and go shopping with it. And despite her not having any association with being Greek anymore, she did attend the Oakland festival with her sisters boyfriend. This made Clara very jealous and they got into a vicious physical fight and Dora left for San Jose. This probably stems from the fact that Dora slept with Clara's boyfriend while they were teenagers, and no doubt that two big time bitches clashed (I thought bitches attracted one another?). It was after this that Dora contacted her husband for the last time saying how miserable she was. About a month later Clara and her boyfriend broke up because she would physically abuse him (with bruises to prove it), leaving him alone with an expensive home. Another man screwed over by a Gaizutis! Very shortly after her last dentist boyfriend she began dating a non-practicing Muslim named Abdul Jabbar Beig (interesting how she leans towards the uncircumcised, thanks to her obsession with my ....). They lived separately for a while and he wouldn't let her sleep over. It was apparent that she was more into him than he was into her, and he came off as a player by observers. These are all the characteristics one would expect for someone like Dora to be with...a jerk. He must be very stupid also or very rich as well for eventually marrying her after a few years and buying her a $724,000 over-priced home despite the fact he is only a teacher trainer and she a teacher. And obviously Dora still does not consider marriage of a sacred nature, but as a business contract (she made this clear to me). At one time she had enough sense to not be in her brothers Jewish wedding, but she has now fallen to the point of marrying an irreligious Muslim. They also had a daughter, Saba Seraphima, whom they named after a lost ancient kingdom of Arabia (???), with a middle name that seems forced in there. It does not get lower than this, and this is after she called her husband John stupid for wanting to possibly name his son Roman or Romanos which at least has a great patron saint, a great hymnographer, and is a well known first name in English.

10. Dora never divorced her first and truest husband with his consent, either legally or most importantly ecclesiastically. He still awaits an ecclesiastical divorce, which he will be forced to do based on her continuous and unrepentant adultery. She convinced her spiritual father that she did get a divorce and that she is actually now living a life of repentance. This cannot be more absurd and ridiculous! How can you repent when you still resent the man that loved you most to hide your own selfishness and hate the person that you sinned against most, and never sought forgiveness from him despite the daily distress you give him as he prays for you daily.

Conclusion: These are the evil fruits of Dora Beig in a very small nutshell. What else should her husband have expected from a woman who doesn't even know what it feels like to have her heart broken despite having been in many relationships, and who had a history of breaking hearts so ruthlessly that one of her boyfriends prior to her first marriage even committed suicide. This one fact alone should have shined a warning spotlight of things to come for her poor husband and the daily insecurity she made him feel in their marriage (which she blamed him for). And no doubt she will divorce her second husband since she never learned from her past mistakes and can't even keep a long-time friendship let alone relationship, though her weird values will probably prevent this now that she has a child and other things to distract her (she once told her first husband after their separation that if they had children she would probably not have left him). Plus, the love and passion Dora and her first husband shared could never be matched by another, but as long as her second husband provides her with her material needs and holds her in high esteem to her family (which is what she really loves him for), then her future looks grim for any possibility of true reflection that will lead to true repentance. Probably the only positive thing I can think of that she has done up until today since her separation is that she somehow managed to have her child baptized Orthodox by some nun. Lord have mercy on her daughter, who will likely be raised with the same self-conflicting values her mother possesses. The only example you can honestly give is the one you lived. The future may be grim now that they decided to move to a sheltered and snobbish town known as a "bubble". Hopefully they don't have a son and name him Muhammad.



----------

The Purpose of this Page

"A true friend prays to God for his friend. A true friend is concerned about the salvation of the soul of his friend. To dissuade a friend from false paths and to direct him on the path of truth, that is precious friendship." - St. Nikolai Velimirovich

"This is the higher philosophy, not only not to requite evil with evil, but to render good for evil." - St. John Chrysostom

----------

St. John Chrysostom On Turning A Sinner From Error

"Christians, above all men, are forbidden to correct the stumblings of sinners by force...it is necessary to make a man better not by force but by persuasion. God gives the crown to those who are kept from evil, not by force, but by choice."

----------

"Over thy Cross the Crescent moon I see!" - Oscar Wilde

(Dora has replaced the Cross of Christ, the Sun of Righteousness, for the Crescent moon of Muhammad the pervert.)

The Sexual Passions and Perversions of Muhammad

Read also: Holy New Martyr Maria Methymopoula (+ 1826) - who chose death over marrying a Muslim, like many other New Martyrs.

----------

Marital Advice Dora Did Not Want To Consider For Her Second Marriage

"Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? And what communion hath light with darkness?" - St. Paul in 2 Corinthians

----------

Most Bad Decisions Are Made In the Name of Love and Romance

A Greek Girl Reverts to Islam

A Greeκ Muslim Lady on Star Channel

----------

"Romance is an illusion; it's sustained through mystery yet crumbles upon inspection."

Read: The Unfaithful Wife (The truth behind Dora's divorce.)

"She has some good advice for men, advising the man who suddenly faces a wife who complains of vague unhappiness and the desire for change to refuse responsibility for her restlessness. The worse thing he can do is blame himself if she does not have a specific complaint."

----------

The True Educator

"Every effort of learning is in vain without the effort of attaining purity of faith and life. The heavenly world is revealed not to the learned but to the pure." - St. Nikolai Velimirovich

‎"Human affairs are fainter than a shadow; more deceitful than a dream. Youth fades more quickly than the flowers of spring; our beauty wastes with age or sickness. Riches are uncertain; glory is fickle. The pursuit of arts and sciences is bounded by the present life; the charm of eloquence, which all covet, reaches but the ear: whereas the practice of virtue is a precious possession for its owner, a delightful spectacle for all who witness it. Make this your study; so will you be worthy of the good things promised by the Lord." - St. Basil the Great

----------

Who Really Appreciates Life In Its Fullest?

----------

"By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher." - Socrates

----------

The First Marriage Is Always Better Than A Second

By St Nikolai Velimirovich

"As virginity is better than marriage, so the first marriage is better than the second." Thus, St. John Chrysostom wrote to the young widow of Tarasius, a deceased nobleman of Constantinople, counseling her not to enter into marriage for the second time. The Church blesses first marriages with joy but the second marriage with sorrow. Eupraxia the elder, the mother of St. Eupraxia and relative of Emperor Theodosius the Great, remained a young widow following the death of her husband Antigonus, with whom she lived in physical contact for only two years and three months, and further lived one more year as brother and sister by mutual pledge. The emperor and empress counseled her to enter into marriage with another nobleman. She would not hear of it, but took her child Eupraxia and together they fled to Egypt. What can we say about St. Olympias and St. Eupraxia the younger? As with St. Macrina, not only was she also betrothed as a virgin but when her betrothed died, she considered herself a widow and would not even in her thoughts consider entering into marriage. What purity of heart! What fidelity to one's betrothed! What fear of God! What obvious faith in the future life in which the betrothed maiden hopes to see her betrothed.

----------

Dora's Mid-life Crisis

"He that finds discontentment in one place is not likely to find happiness in another." - Aesop

Read: Aesop's Fable: The Ass and His Masters

and...

Midlife Crisis Starts At 35

----------

I always thought she would be the death of me.

Her kisses were like those of Judas.

Why did Dora make me feel this way? Because she did not understand that: ‎"Relationships do not cause pain and unhappiness. They bring out the pain and unhappiness that is already in you." She just directed her issues against me and demonized me. Now she has ignorantly shut off her conscience over her past sins against me, which she has convinced Orthodox to do, and I can only try to fulfill the Christian commission spoken of by St. John Chrysostom: "I cannot believe it is possible for a man to be saved if he does not labor for the salvation of his neighbor." Why? Because she clearly showed me her accidie. See for yourself:

"The word accidie means etymologically, 'lack of care', i.e. about one's salvation. With few exceptions, all humanity is now living in the state of accidie. People have become indifferent about their salvation. They do not seek divine life. They confine themselves to forms of life which appertain to the flesh, to everyday needs, to the passions of this world, to mundane activities. God, though, created us out of nothing, in the image of the Absolute and after His likeness. If this revelation is true, then the absence of concern for salvation is nothing else than the death of the human person." - Archmandrite Sophrony (Sakharov) +1993.

David Bowie - Sorrow

Garbage - #1 Crush

The Knickerbockers - Lies

Marilyn Manson - Para-Noir

Soft Cell - Tainted Love

Dido - White Flag

Deep and heartless scars inflicted by shallow and cold people will end up leaving a true lover with an apparent unhealthy love and deep conflict. But at the end of the day, now when Dora would probably claim happiness for herself now that she has the distractions of another relationship, a child and an expensive home, I will not be scandalized.

Scandalized By the Happiness of the Impious and Faithless

"Love is giving someone the power to destroy you, but trusting them not to." (So much for love...)

Her first and truest husband still awaits a sincere apology. Just because she has a child with her second husband doesn't mean its a more true relationship. Raped prostitues also bear children.

------------

What Dora Does Is Unnatural

"It is not right for a maiden once betrothed to a young man to seek another: according to the law of nature there must be only one marriage as there is but one birth and one death." - St. Macrina the Righteous

(From: Saint Macrina - Icon of Female Modesty and Humility)

----------

Multiple Marriages Are Unbecoming

"It is said that the turtle-dove, once separated from her mate, does not contract a new union, but remains in widowhood, in remembrance of her first alliance. Listen, O women! What veneration for widowhood, even in these creatures devoid of reason, how they prefer it to an unbecoming multiplicity of marriages." - St. Basil the Great

----------

The repentant example Dora Should have followed instead of remarrying:

Saint Maria of Tarsus (Sept. 14th)

By St. Nikolai Velimirovich

She lived a life of total debauchery. Two monks traveling through Tarsus stayed at the inn where Maria plied her trade. When she approached the monks, they rebuked her and pushed her aside as unclean. She suddenly repented, and vowed never to sin again. The monks took her to a convent, where Maria lived a life of asceticism until old age. She was made worthy of working miracles even during her lifetime.

(Sometimes a push is necessary, but will it be received with humility or with arrogance?)

-----------

Elder Paisios the Athonite Answers What Is Behind Divorce when he was asked:

- Why, Elder, are couples divorcing?

- People divorce, my child, because they are selfish and egotistical; from nothing else. Any other reason comes from the Evil One in order to justify oneself.

----------

The Pain of Dora's Husband is Heard

A Greek-American Family Man Who Saw The Uncreated Light

The Faithful Husband That Would Not Abandon His Unfaithful Wife

----------

More From Elder Paisios On the Reasons Behind Divorces

"Nowadays, couples separate at the slightest setback; things aren't what they used to be. People have drifted away from the Mystery of Repentance and Confession - drowning in their thoughts and passions."

----------

Dora Became A Convert Who Returned To, and Became Worse, Than Her Former Way of Life

The Apostle John and the Convert Who Returned To His Former Way Of Life

----------

The Pitfalls Of An Orthodox Convert

(A E and F were Doras pitfalls, which led to the destruction of our relationship.)

----------

"To admire the labours of the saints is good; to emulate them wins salvation; but to wish suddenly to imitate their life in every point is unreasonable and impossible." - St. John Climacus

(In the beginning of our relationship Dora would always say she wanted to be a saint, but later in our relationship she bemoaned that she was a better Christian in those early days. This proves the height of Dora's arrogance delusion. A true Christian always considers themselves unworthy of God's glory and always considers themselves sinners. This is the thinking of a saint.)

‎"Know two thoughts and fear them. One says: you are a saint; the other: you will not be saved. Both these thoughts are from the enemy, and there is no truth in them. You must think: 'I am a great sinner, but the Lord is merciful, He loves His children greatly, and will forgive my sins.' But don’t depend on your deeds, though you may have worked much. One ascetic said to me, 'I must surely be forgiven, for I bow so many times per day,' but when death came, he tore at his shirt. So, not for our labors, but in His grace the Lord dispenses mercy. The Lord wishes our souls to be humble, absent of hate and willing to forgive all, then the Lord shall forgive us with joy." - St. Silouan the Athonite

"Having let go of a light burden, namely, self-reproach, we have taken up the heaviest, namely, self-justification." - Abba John the Short

----------

A Comedic Interlude

The Desperate Wife Hunter

----------

Nothing Accounts For Dora's Behavior and Thinking Than Lack of Faith

Losing Your Faith Is Bad For Your Health

----------

"The more selfish one is the further away from God he turns." - Elder Ephraim of Vatopaidi

----------

Adulterous Passion Is Death

----------

St. Nektarios, Whom Dora Venerated in Aegina, On Divorce

"Therefore, the causes behind divorces should not be regarded as originating from the fear - as taught by Paul - but should be sought elsewhere; perhaps in the lack of that sacred 'fear'."

(From: And the Wife Should Reverence Her Husband)

----------


Tertullian Laments the Tragedy of a Woman Who Abandons Her Husband

"For if the wife reverenced her husband [as commanded in Scripture], she would not have dared to go. If the husband loved his wife, he would never have allowed and tolerated her going. For what is worse than this outrage, I ask you?... But if she were going off to a lover, would you not have stood up? Would you not have been inflamed? Would you not have posted guards on all sides? But as it is, you do not see her going off to commit adultery with a man, but going off to be with demons — and you allow this impiety?"

(What Dora's husband did was the natural and normal thing any man should do.)

----------

St. Silouan the Athonite On Divorce

“Those who dislike and reject their fellow-man are impoverished in their being. They do not know the true God, who is all-embracing love.” — Saint Silouan the Athonite

----------

On Those Who Do Wrong To Achieve A Goal

By Elder Paisios the Athonite

"But whoever says, 'If I am to achieve that goal, I must do wrong,' and so forth, that person is sinning on purpose and intentionally. In other words, he plans and lays out his scheme to sin in cahoots with the devil. This is especially evil because it is premeditated. It isn't simply falling into temptation, but rather setting out to do something evil along with the tempter --- the devil. Such a person should never expect to be helped, because he does not deserve divine help; and he will - in all likelihood - die unrepentant."

(Dora told me that one day she would repent, but not now. But this attitude will be judged either in this life or the next.)

----------

Dora's Philosophy On How To Land A New Husband

"When women go wrong, men go right after them." - Mae West

----------

Dora, inspired by demons, came to resent her husband and continues to do so till this day.

On Grudges and Resentment

“If you bear a grudge against anyone, pray for him and you will stop the passion in its tracks.

By prayer you separate the hurt from the memory of the evil which he did you and in becoming loving and kind you completely obliterate passion from the soul.

On the other hand, if someone else bears you a grudge, be generous and humble with him, treat him fairly, and you will deliver him from the passion.” - St. Maximus the Confessor

----------

St. Paul says in Ephesians 4:26:

"The sun should not go down on your anger, and you should not give room to the devil."

(Dora foolishly thinks St. Paul here was "extremely controlling".)

----------

Never! I Will Never Forgive Him!

----------

Be Angry, And Sin Not

----------

When Dora Gave the Silent Treatment

(Dora accused her husband of being controlling and abusive, to hide the fact that she was the one who was controlling and abusive.)

----------

Do Not Resent, Do Not React, Keep Inner Stillness

…One of the things which is so difficult to come to terms with is the reality that when we bear anger and resentment and bitterness in our hearts, we erect barriers to God’s grace within ourselves. It’s not that God stops giving us His grace. It’s that we say, “No. I don’t want it.” What is His grace? It is His love, His mercy, His compassion, His activity in our lives. The holy Fathers tell us that each and every human person who has ever been born on this earth bears the image of God undistorted within themselves. In our Tradition there is no such thing as fallen nature. There are fallen persons, but not fallen nature. The implication of this truth is that we have no excuses for our sins. We are responsible for our sins, for the choices we make. We are responsible for our actions, and our reactions. “The devil made me do it” is no excuse, because the devil has no more power over us than we give him. This is hard to accept, because it is really convenient to blame the devil. It is also really convenient to blame the other person, or our past. But, it is also a lie. Our choices are our own.

On an even deeper level, this spiritual principle – do not react – teaches us that we need to learn to not react to thoughts. One of the fundamental aspects of this is inner watchfulness. This might seem like a daunting task, considering how many thoughts we have. However, our watchfulness does not need to be focused on our thoughts. Our watchfulness needs to be focused on God. We need to maintain the conscious awareness of God’s presence. If we can maintain the conscious awareness of His presence, our thoughts will have no power over us. We can, to paraphrase St. Benedict, dash our thoughts against the presence of God. This is a very ancient patristic teaching. We focus our attention on the remembrance of God. If we can do that, we will begin to control our troubling thoughts. Our reactions are about our thoughts. After all, if someone says something nasty to us, how are we reacting? We react first through our thinking, our thoughts. Perhaps we’re habitually accustomed to just lashing out after taking offense with some kind of nasty response of our own. But keeping watch over our minds so that we maintain that living communion with God leaves no room for distracting thoughts. It leaves plenty of room if we decide we need to think something through intentionally in the presence of God. But as soon as we engage in something hateful, we close God out. And the converse is true – as long as we maintain our connection to God, we won’t be capable of engaging in something hateful. We won’t react…. - Metropolitan Jonah

----------

No Wonder Dora Treated and Dumped Her Husband Like A Boyfriend

Women Who Lost Virginity Early More Likely To Divorce: New Study

----------

Dora Does Not How To Be A True Friend Because of Her Selfishness

‎"The genuineness of a friend is shown at a time of trial, if he shares the distress you suffer." - St. Thalassios the Libyan

(I should have known Dora was never a genuine friend when she constantly refused to share in my distress, but rather focused on her own at the expense of mine. And every act of kindness and concern I showed was seen as something cruel or evil.)

----------

‎"Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good." - St. Paul in Romans 12:21

----------

The Selfish Spirit Behind Dora's Restraining Order Against Me

[Our spiritual situation today] is similar to what happened in the days of idolatry. Back then, if you reviled the idols, they would stone you or put you to a miserable death. Now in our times, every passion has taken the place of an idol. And if you reprove or criticize the passion that you see overcoming each person, they all shout, "Stone him, because he has reviled our gods!" - Elder Joseph the Hesychast (+1959)

----------

"If a man is treated with contempt by someone and yet does not react with anger in either word or thought, it shows he has acquired real knowledge and firm faith in the Lord." - St. Mark the Ascetic

----------

When Marriage Makes One A Philosopher

----------

The Nagging Wife

'A wife should never nag her husband: "You lazy coward, you have no ambition! Look at our relatives and neighbors; they have plenty of money. Their wives have far more than I do." Let no wife say any such thing; she is her husband's body, and it is not for her to dictate to her head, but to submit and obey. "But why should she endure poverty?" some will ask. If she is poor, let her console herself by thinking of those who are much poorer still. If she really loved her husband, she would never speak to him like that, but would value having him close to her more than all the gold in the world....Furnish your house neatly and soberly. If the bridegroom shows his wife that he takes no pleasure in worldly excess, and will not stand for it, their marriage will remain free from the evil influences that are so popular these days.'

- St John Chrysostom

----------

Nagging: Is It Killing Your Marriage?

----------

Happinness Comes From Within, Not From Other People Or Things

St. Nektarios, a great saint of our times, put it very well in a letter he wrote:

"He who seeks sources of joy within himself has gone astray, and is in a state of delusion. For example, one person we love, comes from abroad to our monastery. Naturally, we rejoice that he is with us. But as much as we rejoice in his presence, we equally grieve when he leaves. We can take this thought further. We lo...ve a certain person, but God takes him from us and he leaves this life, and the love we had for him turns into equal pain after his death. Therefore, a person should not absolutize the joys that are outside of him. The source of joy is in his heart; it is the constant presence of grace. Therefore a man of God is always peaceful and calm at both joyful and sad events."

----------

True Love and Purity Go Hand In Hand

"The purer the heart is, the larger it is, and the more able it is to find room within it for a greater number of beloved ones; while the more sinful it is, the more contracted it becomes, and the less number of beloved can it find room for, because it is limited by self-love, and that love is a false one." - St. John of Kronstadt

Dora Prefers the Carnal Over Christ

"When one sins, and especially in the flesh - and I am not referring to the carnal relations within a marriage in Christ - it shows that they are preferring carnal pleasure more than Christ and as such, are denying Christ in practice." - Metropolitan Hierotheos of Nafpaktos

----------

On Purity and Chastity

----------

Why We See The Faults of Others and Ignore Our Own

‎"When we gaze at our own failings, we see such a swamp that nothing in another can equal it. That is why we turn away and make much of the faults of others. Instead of condemning others, strive to reach inner peace. Keep silent, refrain from judgment. This will raise you above the deadly arrows of slander, insult and outrage and will shield your glowing hearts against all evil." - St. Seraphim of Sarov

----------

When I asked Dora to live like brother and sister in our marriage, she said she was too weak. When I asked her to live in purity after our separation, she said she was too weak.

What to Do When We Feel Weak

----------

Monk Moses the Athonite on Marriage:

Marriage is an arena for exercising humility, mutual leeway and mutual respect, and not the parallel journey of two egotisms despite a lifelong coupling and coexistence. The devil dances for joy whenever there is no forgiveness in human weaknesses and in everyday mistakes.

(Dora easily forgives her own mistakes, but bitterly resents anyone that may make a mistake around her.)

----------

"Remember the ten thousand talents that Christ forgave you? Do not become a cruel collector of a smaller debt." - St. Gregory the Theologian

-----------

Elder Dionysios the Athonite on Divorce:

Many families suffer because there is selfish egotism within, which stifles love and throws it away! Couples do not practice patience. The husband does not honor the wife, nor the wife the husband, and they suffer and torture themselves and make their children unhappy. But he/she that you took [in marriage], are they not from the Church? Why do you constantly forget this?

Why? Because they reach the point of divorce. This is the worst. What can I say? People with two and three and four kids dissolve the great Mystery of Marriage. My, my, my! Fearful, fearful! What pain in those poor children, what sorrow, what grief! ... We ensure them with a dark life. Be careful! A mother is one thing, but a second wife or relatives to help them is another. Within each family there must be a Divine Liturgy, since it is a "house church". How can you father, how can you mother, ruin this Mystery? As good and beautiful is another woman, as good and beautiful is another man, she is the wife the Church gave you, he is the husband God gave you in "glory and honor". Forget about everything else. We must have patience. That is our cross. Patience! Ah, Satan constantly works.

-----------

"I don't love you anymore...I love Jason Varitek." - Shameless Dora Gaizutis to her husband the night she abandoned him

Jason Varitek Proposes To Catherine Panagiotopoulos

-----------

Civil Divorces Should Not Be Acknowledged By Christians

"Civil Divorces are not acknowledged by the Orthodox Church, unless for causes she sanctions; and, therefore, no civilly divorced person can be reunited in wedlock to another party, unless divorced by the Church, as well as by the State." - St Raphael Hawaweeny

-----------

"No-Fault Divorce": Its Atheistic and Secular Roots

-----------

Better To Be A Faithful Christian Than A Social Butterfly

“It is essential in these days to be able to protect ourselves from the influence of those with whom we come in contact. Otherwise we risk losing both faith and prayer. Let the whole world dismiss us as unworthy of attention, trust or respect – it will not matter provided that the Lord accepts us. And vice versa: it will profit us nothing if the whole world thinks well of us and sings our praises, if the Lord declines to abide with us.” - Elder Sophrony Sakharov of Essex

A time is coming when people will go mad and when they see someone who is not mad, they will attack him, saying "You are mad, you are not like us". - St. Anthony the Great

‎"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." — Friedrich Nietzsche

"He who walks with wise men becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm." - Proverbs

-----------

Dora's Greed



"The love of money is the root of all evil." - St. Paul the Apostle

-----------

A Wife's Selfishness

"Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she will take it anyway." - Joey Adams

‎"Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!"

-----------

How Those Deceived By Satan Repress Their Conscience By Convincing Themselves They Are Normal

"The joys cover the mistake and push it further and deeper down, but it still continues to work internally. This is how a person begins to harden: by violating his conscience and covering his heart. The devil comes in to justify everything for him: 'This is nothing, this is normal...;' but there is no peace in the man's heart, simply because the cause of the problem has been repressed underneath. He feels troubled and has no inner serenity. He lives in a constant state of anxiety and feels tormented. He cannot find what is at fault, because his faults have been repressed and covered up. He doesn't understand that he is suffering because of his sins." - Elder Paisios the Athonite

(Dora once tried to convine her husband was abnormal for trying to save their marriage.)

-----------

How Dora Should Repent

"Anyone who has fallen into fornication, adultery or any other such bodily impurity, should desist from this revolting filth and cleanse himself through confession, tears, fasting and the like. For God judges unrepentant fornicators and adulterers. He condemns them, dismisses them and consigns them to hell, unquenchable fire and other never-ending punishments, saying, 'Let the impure and accursed be taken away, lest they see and enjoy the glory of the Lord' (cf. Isa. 26:10 Lxx)." - St Gregory Palamas

-----------



----------

St. Kosmas Aitolos: On Divorce and Adultery

----------

Lust and the Search For Meaning

----------

“Attend to your self, lest something destructive divorce you from the love of God, and dwell in your heart. And do not become listless, saying, 'How shall I guard her (the heart), since I am a sinful person?' For when a person puts aside one’s sins and turns around to God, that person’s repentance rebirths one and makes all things new.” - St. Isaiah the Solitary

-----------

How Dora's Husband Feels: True Love Never Dies

"For such is the power of love, it embraces, and unites, and fastens together not only those who are present, and near, and visible but also those who are far distant; and neither length of time, nor separation in space, nor anything else of that kind can break up and sunder in pieces the affection of the soul." - St. John Chrysostom

"The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread." - Mother Teresa

‎"What is hell? I maintain that it is the suffering of being unable to love."
- Elder Zosima, in Fyodor Dostoevsky's The Brothers Karamazov

"How much you love your worst enemy is the measure of how much you love God." - Metropolitan Jonah

"The greater the love the greater the sorrow." - St. Silouan the Athonite

The Martyrdom and Love of Taking Upon Us Other's Sins

I used to think she took my breath away, but I realized I was just suffocated by her bullshit.

-----------

A Sign of Dora's Impiety

My Pilgrimage To The Monastery of Saints Raphael, Nicholas and Irene in Lesvos

-----------

Appropriate Sayings of Elder Paisios the Athonite (+ 1993)

- "I have noticed that only an egotistical person will leave Orthodoxy once he has learned it; a humble person never leaves."

- "Jolting is necessary in order to shake a person out of indifference and make them face reality."

- "Remove your self, your egoism, from your actions; and then you will be motivated by pure reasons. Indiscreet behavior will often do more harm than the irresponsible behavior of the insane; because the indiscreet wound sensitive hearts with their sharp words; and will often mortally traumatize them by leading them to desperation."

- "If we are to experience the supernatural, we must live supernaturally."

- "God gave man a mind so that he can become aware of his fault, repent and ask forgiveness. Unrepentance is a cruel thing. The unrepentant person is very foolish in not wanting to repent and thus be spared from the small hell in which he is now living, and which will lead him to eternal hell."

- "Someone who has committed serious sins can reflect on his condition and say, 'I am not worthy to even lift up my head and look at another human being.' By greatly humbling himself, one can receive tremendous Grace; and steadily move on to great spiritual heights. On the other hand, one who has not sinned greatly - but does not properly evaluate himself - might say, 'God has guarded me from so many dangers, and yet I am so ungrateful. I'm so much more sinful than the greatest sinner.' Such a person is - in fact - spiritually inferior to the other."

- "Do not listen to your own thoughts, because you will end up losing your mind."

-------------

Living the California Dream In the Bubble

Trailer: Day of the Locust

-------------

Elder Paisios On How The Weak Must Correct Ourselves

"First of all, we need willpower. In a way, willpower provides the good foundation. Secondly, one must become aware that he is sick, and take the necessary antibiotic treatment; otherwise - if one is sick and hides the sickness, if he refuses to acknowledge it to himself and others - he will suddenly collapse someday before he realizes it, and will already be beyond medical help. ... What I'm trying to say is that when it comes to spiritual life, those who justify, hide or ignore their passions and faults, will - in the end - receive such demonic influence that they won't be able to hide. Have you any idea what it is like to accept demonic influence? One becomes like a beast --- fiercely defensive, foul-mouthed, refusing any help from anyone."

-------------

What Should Have Been Dora's Prayer

"The demons are sleepless and immaterial, death is at hand, and I
am weak. Lord, help me; do not let Thy creature perish, for Thou
carest for me in my misery." - St. Peter of Damascus

-------------

On the Burden of Sin and Deliverance From Sin

-------------

Some Lives of Saints

The "Secret" Sin of Saint Theodora of Alexandria

Saint Andronikos and His Wife Athanasia

Sts. Pelagia the Martyr, Pelagia the Righteous and Thais: Three Different Responses to Sexual Immorality

Saint Pelagia the Righteous: A Repentant Sinner

Holy Martyr Nikephoros of Antioch

The Life and Miracles of Saint Paul the Simple

-------------

The Uncontrollable Harlot

By Archimandrite Touma (Bitar)

The passions of soul and body became an uncontrollable harlot and in the absence of internal restraints within people’s souls, the ladder of values and traditional moral restraints collapsed and value and morals came to be centered on purported individual freedom and man’s worship of himself. Then individual freedom and self-worship caused people’s aspirations to become greater than his environment’s capacity to pump vital capital into them and so heaven and earth could no longer match people’s wild cravings. Their storehouses started to be depleted and their balance was thrown off. The environment became ill on account of the illness of man’s heart and the unleashing of his passions beyond any limit.

And now what remains? Souls have become addicted to consumption. Man has become an instrument of consumption! Today man’s worldly identity is in what he consumes! Wills have become feeble and souls have become weak! Man has tasted this number of varieties of selfish freedom and self-worship. He no longer desires or is capable of repentance – that is, of a change of mentality and behavior. For him repentance is identical to death. For this reason he starts to live off of his fantasies, his dreams, his self-esteem, his accomplishments, and his cravings until death. He sees that he is approaching an unstable precipice and he is unable to stop before it, and he doesn’t care! He has become addicted to himself and death has become less painful than resisting his addiction. In letting loose his passions, his will to live starts to die. Death becomes life for him, and he has no other life!

Read more here.

-------------

Dora's Fruits of Divorce Proved She Is A Selfish Whore, Truth Be Told. Here is a Prayer She Should Have Prayed.

Prayer for Strength in Weakness By St Ephraim of Syria

Lord Jesus Christ, King of kings, you have power over life and death. You know even things that are uncertain and obscure, and our very thoughts and feelings are not hidden from you. Cleanse me from my secret faults, and I have done wrong and you saw it. You know how weak I am, both in soul and in body. Give me strength, O Lord, in my frailty and sustain me in my sufferings. Grant me a prudent judgement, dear Lord, and let me always be mindful of your blessings. Let me retain until the end your grace that has protected me till now.

-------------

What Some Church Fathers Said About Divorce

- "All who have been twice married by human law, are sinners in the eyes of our Master." - St. Justin Martyr ("First Apology," c. 160 A.D.)

- "A wife must not depart from her husband. Or, if she should depart, she must remain unmarried." - St. Cyprian of Carthage ("Testimonies," c. 250 A.D.)

- "A man who marries after another man's wife has been taken away from him will be charged with adultery in the case of the first woman; but in the case of the second he will be guiltless." - St. Basil the Great ("Second Canonical Letter to Amphilochius" c. 375 A.D.)

- "No one is permitted to know a woman other than his wife. The marital right is given you for this reason: lest you fall into the snare and sin with a strange woman. 'If you are bound to a wife do not seek a divorce'; for you are not permitted, while your wife lives, to marry another." - St. Ambrose of Milan ("Abraham" c. 387 A.D.)

- "You dismiss your wife, therefore, as if by right and without being charged with wrongdoing; and you suppose it is proper for you to do so because no human law forbids it; but divine law forbids it. Anyone who obeys men ought to stand in awe of God. Hear the law of the Lord, which even they who propose our laws must obey: 'What God has joined together let no man put asunder."' - St. Ambrose of Milan ("Commentary on Luke" c. 389 A.D.)

- "Do not tell me about the violence of the ravisher, about the persuasiveness of a mother, about the authority of a father, about the influence of relatives, about the intrigues and insolence of servants, or about household [financial] losses. So long as a husband lives, be he adulterer, be he sodomite, be he addicted to every kind of vice, if she left him on account of his crimes he is still her husband still and she may not take another." - St. Jerome ("Letters" c. 396 A.D.)

- "Wherever there is fornication and a suspicion of fornication a wife is freely dismissed. Because it is always possible that someone may calumniate the innocent and, for the sake of a second joining in marriage, act in criminal fashion against the first, it is commanded that when the first wife is dismissed a second may not be taken while the first lives." St. Jerome ("Commentaries on Matthew" c. 398 A.D.)
"If a man leaves his wife and she marries another, she commits adultery." - St. Augustine of Hippo ("On the Good of Marriage" c. 401 A.D.)

----------------



----------------

Trust God, Not Men

----------------

“Marriage is three parts love and seven parts forgiveness of sins.” - G. K. Chesterton

----------------

"When dealing with people, remember you are not dealing with creatures of logic, but with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudice, and motivated by pride and vanity." - Dale Carnegie

----------------

Let Us Not Draw Back Towards Perdition, But Move Forward In Salvation

From Hebrews 10:26-39:

For if we sin willfully after we have received the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins, but a certain fearful expectation of judgment, and fiery indignation which will devour the adversaries. Anyone who has rejected Moses’ law dies without mercy on the testimony of two or three witnesses. Of how much worse punishment, do you suppose, will he be thought worthy who has trampled the Son of God underfoot, counted the blood of the covenant by which he was sanctified a common thing, and insulted the Spirit of grace? For we know Him who said, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,” says the Lord. And again, “The LORD will judge His people.” It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.

But recall the former days in which, after you were illuminated, you endured a great struggle with sufferings: partly while you were made a spectacle both by reproaches and tribulations, and partly while you became companions of those who were so treated; for you had compassion on me in my chains, and joyfully accepted the plundering of your goods, knowing that you have a better and an enduring possession for yourselves in heaven. Therefore do not cast away your confidence, which has great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that after you have done the will of God, you may receive the promise:

“For yet a little while,
And He who is coming will come and will not tarry.
Now the just shall live by faith;
But if anyone draws back,
My soul has no pleasure in him.”

But we are not of those who draw back to perdition, but of those who believe to the saving of the soul.

----------------

On Putting Off Our Repentance For Another Day

----------------

The Erroneous Teachings We Follow

By St. Luke of Crimea

We accept only those teachings that nourish our self-love and ego and help us follow our own way, the way of sin. We fight against anything that comes in contrast with our goals, anything that rebukes the futility of our erroneous path. We fight truth because we follow the teachings that we ourselves have created or that we have heard from others; the ones that are in agreement with our desire, to live well in this temporary life.

Whatever is in agreement with our goals and the path that we have chosen we regard as true. We unquestionably accept it and project it as grounds for defending our own convictions and the mistaken teachings we follow, which do not agree with what Christ taught and for which we know deep in our heart are incorrect... May the Lord help us always follow the way of righteousness within Christ's light. Amen.

-----------------

Cleveland Deemed Most Miserable City in USA

-----------------

"TRUE JOY" by Elder Moses the Athonite

-----------------

The Penitential Prayer of St. Mary of Egypt

My Panagia, Mother of God, who gave birth in the flesh to God the Word. I know, O how well I know, that it is no honor or praise to thee when one so impure and depraved as I looks up to thy icon, O Ever-Virgin, who didst keep thy body and soul in purity. Rightly do I inspire hatred and disgust before thy virginal purity. But I have heard that God Who was born of thee became man for the purpose to call sinners to repentance. Then help me, for I have no other help. Order the entrance of the church to be opened to me. Allow me to see the venerable Tree on which He Who was born of thee suffered in the flesh and on which He shed His holy Blood for the redemption of sinners like me, unworthy as I am. Be my faithful witness before thy Son that I will never again defile my body by the impurity of fornication, but as soon as I have seen the Tree of the Cross I will renounce the world and its temptations and will go wherever thou wilt lead me.

My loving Panagia, thou hast shown me thy great love for all men. Glory to God Who receives the repentance of sinners through thee. What more can I recollect or say, I who am so sinful? It is time for me, my Panagia, to fulfil my vow, according to thy witness. Now lead me by the hand along the path of repentance!

- Read also: Saint Mary of Egypt: A Living Example of the Power of Repentance

- "Those who have lived a sinful life, but have repented and begun to live spiritually, should joyfully accept any forthcoming humiliation and grief; for this is how they clear their debts. St. Mary of Egypt had lived a sinful life; but even after she repented and changed her way of life, worldly desires still tormented her. She undertook, however, a most valiant effort to overcome them. Yet, the devil would whisper to her: 'What do you stand to lose if you take a look at the great city of Alexandria? I am not saying that you go and entertain yourself, just take a look from afar.' But she wouldn't even as much as turn in that direction. Her repentance was indeed magnificent!" - Elder Paisios the Athonite

--------------

"Repentance signifies regret, change of mind. The distinguishing marks of repentance are contrition, tears, aversion towards sin, and love of the good." - St. Nektarios of Aegina

--------------

‎"Let us charge into the good fight with joy and love without being afraid of our enemies. Though unseen themselves, they can look at the face of our soul, and if they see it altered by fear, they take up arms against us all the more fiercely. For the cunning creatures have observed that we are scared. So let us take up arms against them courageously. No one will fight with a resolute fighter." - St. John of the Ladder

--------------

“Fire and water do not mix, neither can you mix judgment of others with the desire to repent." - St. John of the Ladder

--------------

"Do not trust your mind too much; thinking must be refined by suffering, or it will not stand the test of these cruel times." - Fr. Seraphim Rose of Platina, CA

--------------

Through Patience Can You Regain Your Soul

"You will gain possession of your souls through your patient endurance" (Luke 21:19).

St. Gregory of Sinai writes:

- In whatever work we engage patience gives birth to courage,
- Courage to commitment,
- Commitment to perseverance,
- Perseverance to an increase in the work done.
- Such additional labour quells the body's dissolute impulses and checks the desire for sensual indulgence.
- Thus checked, desire gives rise to spiritual longing,
- Longing to love,
- Love to aspiration,
- Aspiration to ardour,
- Ardour to self-galvanizing,
- Self-galvanizing to assiduousness,
- Assiduousness to prayer,
- Prayer to stillness.
- Stillness gives birth to contemplation,
- Contemplation to spiritual knowledge,
- Knowledge to the apprehension of the mysteries.
- The consummation of the mysteries is theology,
- The fruit of theology is perfect love,
- Of love humility,
- Of humility dispassion,
- Of dispassion foresight, prophecy and foreknowledge.
- No one possesses the virtues perfectly in this life, nor does he cut off evil all at once. On the contrary, by small increases of virtue evil gradually ceases to exist.

--------------

On Those Who Go Astray After Becoming Christians

Nevertheless, what can be said about those who have received Baptism and Chrismation as the two eyes of the soul and, in spite of that, sin as those who are unbaptized? At the Last Judgment, they will not be treated as those who are born blind, rather they will be treated like transgressors who willfully disfigured and blinded themselves.

Still, what can be said about those who received the other Mysteries of Grace in the fullness of Orthodoxy and who have before them the examples of the saints and who constantly listen to the warnings and admonitions of God's Church but, nevertheless, depart and go astray? At the Last Judgment, such will not be able to justify themselves with any type of blindness, rather they will be judged as transgressors who have disfigured themselves and others around them with blindness.

- St Nikolai Velimirovich

--------------

The Virtue In My Love For Dora, Despite Her Meanness

"It is not the self-critical who reveals his humility (for does not everyone have somehow to put up with himself?). Rather it is the man who continues to love the person who has criticized him." - St. John of the Ladder

--------------

There Is No Rest On Earth For Those Desiring Salvation

By St. Nikolai Velimirovich

There can be no rest for those on earth who desire to be saved," says St. Ephrem the Syrian. The struggle is unceasing be it either external or internal. The adversary acts visibly at times through men and other things, and at other times invisibly through thoughts. At times, the adversary appears openly and behaves brutally and cruelly like an enemy and, at other times, under the guise of a flattering friend he seduces by shrewdness. That which occurs in battle between two opposing armies also occurs to every man individually in battle with the passions of this world. Truly, "there can be no rest for those on earth who desire to be saved." When salvation comes, rest also comes.

-----------

"Many say, 'I believe in God'; but should any misfortune or temptation arise, they grow fainthearted and despondent. Sometimes they begin to murmur. And what becomes of all their faith? This should be the very time to show submission to the will of God, and to say, "Let it be as the Lord wills." "Blessed be the name of the Lord." Otherwise it is evident that they only believe in God in the time of happiness, and renounce Him in the time of misfortune." - St. John of Kronstadt

-----------

St. Tikhon: Address to a Newly-Married Couple

-----------

A Poem By William Blake titled "Love's Secret"

Never seek to tell thy love,
Love that never told can be;
For the gentle wind does move
Silently, invisibly.
I told my love, I told my love,
I told her all my heart;
Trembling, cold, in ghastly fears,
Ah! she did depart!

Soon as she was gone from me,
A traveler came by,
Silently, invisibly
He took her with a sigh.

-----------

Sayings of Elder Thaddeus of Serbia

- A proud person is never satisfied; everything bothers him, and he follows his own will.

- We must be obedient to the will of God in order to learn humility and meekness
while we are still in this life, while there is still time.

- A heart that is full of love thinks not of itself, but of others. It prays for all living things and for the whole world.

- Physical, outward humility is easier to attain than inner humility --- humility of the mind. That is a special gift. Our holy Father, St. Symeon [the New Theologian], says that a person who has attained humility of the mind cannot be hurt by anything in the world. Whatever happens, such a person is always at peace. This is truly a Divine property.

-----------

The High End of Low: A Poem By John Sanidopoulos

-----------

Les Fleur du Mal


I keep watering a dead flower
Keep watering a dead flower
Keep watering the dead flower
Keep watering a dead flower
Keep watering a dead flower
Keep watering a dead flower
Keep watering a dead flower
Everything I make is a piece of plant
In some day it could have been a flower
And the things that are flowers are dead
I keep watering a dead flower
Keep watering a dead flower
There’s not enough of me to make a bouquet
There’s not enough of me to make a bouquet
Stop watering a dead flower
Stop watering the dead flower
Stop watering a dead flower.

- Marilyn Manson in Doppelherz, 2003

(Dora is the dead flower spoken here.)

-----------

"And I did have an experience where I was struggling to deal with being alone and being forsaken and being betrayed by putting your trust in one person, and making the mistake of that being the wrong person ... And every time I called her that day — I called 158 times — I took a razorblade and I cut myself on my face or on my hands." - Marilyn Manson

-----------

A Similar Spiritual Father Is the Best Success For A Healthy Marriage

"I know married couples who were compatible, but ended up divorcing because they they did not have the same Spiritual Father to help them; while others - who were not compatible, but had the same Spiritual Father - were able to live their whole life together harmoniously." - Elder Paisios the Athonite

-----------

A True Spiritual Father Will Help You Find Your Faults, Not Justify Your Errors

"The goal is how to be at peace in Paradise, and not how to be at peace on earth. There are some Spiritual Fathers who put the thoughts of others at ease, and then these persons exclaim, 'The Spiritual Father has granted me a great degree of inner peace,' but they, unfortunately, remain uncorrected. In fact, these Spiritual Fathers are suppose to help the person find his faults, help him correct his faults, and then guide him forward in his life. Only then does real peace come. Just putting someone at peace in his passions is of no help; for me, this is a crime." - Elder Paisios the Athonite

(Dora obviously convinced her spiritual father of her repentance, though she has taken no effort to repent.)

-----------

Seek Not Earthly, But Heavenly Success

By St. John Chrysostom

"If then you desire joy, seek not after riches, nor bodily health, nor glory, nor power, nor luxury, nor sumptuous tables, nor vestures of silk, nor costly lands, nor houses splendid and conspicuous, nor any thing else of that kind; but pursue that spiritual wisdom which is according to God, and take hold of virtue; and then nought of the things which are present, or which are expected, will be able to sadden you. Why do I say to sadden? Verily, the things that make others sad, will prove to you an accession of pleasure. For scourges, and death, and losses, and slanders, and the being evil entreated, and all such things, when they are brought upon us for God's sake, and spring from this root, will bring into our souls much pleasure. For no one will be able to make us miserable, if we do not make ourselves such; nor, on the other hand, blessed, if we do not make ourselves such, following up the grace of God."

-----------

The Initial Mark of a Christian Husband

Once there came to St. Seraphim of Sarov a mother who was concerned about how she might arrange the best possible marriage for her young daughter. When she came to Saint Seraphim for advice, he said to her: "Before all else, ensure that he, whom your daughter chooses as her companion for life, keeps the fasts. If he does not, then he is not a Christian, whatever he may consider himself to be."

(Does this describe Jabbar? Not that Dora cares, since she based her decision to marry him on her greed.)

-----------

Dora's Husband Should Not Be Surprised

A Prophecy of St Seraphim Of Vyritsa (1866-1949)

The time will come when there will be no persecution, but money and the attractions of this world will draw people away from God and many more souls will perish than during the period of open militant atheism. On the one hand, they will raise up crosses and gild cupolas, but on the other hand, the kingdom of lies and evil will come. The True Church will always be persecuted. Salvation will only be possible through sorrows and illness, persecutions will take on a very refined and unpredictable character. It will be terrible to live to those times.

--------------

The Love John Desired



--------------

Instead of Dora Seeking (Long) Hugs and Comfort From Friends, She Should Have Had Faith

"A spoiled child lies on the ground for a long time when it has fallen. It seeks sympathy and comforting caresses. Do not fuss over yourself, no matter how it hurts. Get up again and resume the battle. He who fights gets wounded. Only angels never fall." - Tito Colliander, The Way of the Ascetics

--------------

The world spreads its legs for the illusion of happiness.

--------------

"YOU WERE FROM A PERFECT WORLD
A WORLD THAT THREW ME AWAY TODAY
TO RUN AWAY." - Marilyn Manson

--------------

Was It Worth It?

- "It is by no means an irrational fancy that, in a future existence, we shall look upon what we think our present existence, as a dream." - Edgar Allan Poe

- "The soul is nourished where it feeds, either from this world or from the Spirit of God." - St. Macarius the Great

- "Indeed, there are many details in this world, as well as in things and in events, that are unintelligible and inappropriate to us. Only when the entire thing as a whole is revealed to us do we understand and are reassured. We consider many of the sufferings and deprivations in our lives as truly ugly and senseless at the time they occur. However, when days and years pass, those very sufferings and deprivations shine as precious stones in our memory, illumining the later path of our life. Therefore, if something in God's creation offends you, look at the whole; if something in life embitters you, wait patiently with faith and hope for new days and years. And if this entire life seems painful and sorrowful to you, raise your spiritual eyes to the other world, and you will have peace and joy. For this entire visible world is not a perfect whole-the other world also exists. For it is said: God created the heaven and the earth (Genesis 1:1). Even an artist directs the viewer to look at his painting from a distance, so that he may see it in all its beauty. - St. Nikolai Velimirovich

--------------

Advice From Fr. Seraphim of Platina, California

Father Seraphim Rose said:

"Let us not, who would be Christians, expect anything else from it than to be crucified. For to be a Christian is to be crucified, in this time and in any time since Christ came for the first time. His life is the example--and warning--to us all. We must be crucified personally, mystically; for through crucifixion is the only path to resurrection. If we would rise with C...hrist, we must first be humbled with Him--even to the ultimate humiliation, being devoured and spit forth by the uncomprehending world.

"And we must be crucified outwardly, in the eyes of the world; for Christ's Kingdom is not of this world, and the world cannot bear it, even in a single representation of it, even for a single moment. The world can only accept Antichrist, now or at anytime.

"No wonder, then, that it is so hard to be Christian--it is not hard it is impossible. No one can knowingly accept a way of life which, the more truly it is lived, leads more surely to one's own destruction. And that is way we constantly rebel, try to make life easier, try to be half-Christian, try to make the best of both worlds. We must ultimately choose--our felicity lies in one world or the other, not in both.

"God give is the strength to pursue the path of crucifixion; there is not other way to be Christian."

--------------

Above All Else, Dora Should Not Despair

On Despair and Salvation

--------------

"Do not be despondent when fighting against the incorporeal enemy,
but even in the midst of your afflictions and oppression praise the LORD,
Who has found you worthy to suffer for Him, by struggling against the subtlety of
the serpent, and to be wounded for Him at every hour,
for had you not lived piously and endeavored to become united to God,
the enemy would not have attacked and tormented you." - St.John Kronstadt

--------------

St. Macarius said, "If you accept humiliation as if it were dignifying, blame as praiseworthy, poverty as richness, you will not die."

--------------

What Will Be the Excuse of Our Generation?

--------------

More On Why I Say All These Things, To Help Dora In Living A True Life In Christ and Be Angry Towards Her Sins Against God and Her Me

"Reprimand and rebuke should be accepted as healing remedies for vice and as conducive to good health. From this it is clear that those who pretend to be tolerant because they wish to flatter . . . those who thus fail to correct sinners . . . actually cause them to suffer supreme loss and plot the destruction of that life which is their true life." - St. Basil the Great

"There is among the passions an anger of the intellect, and this anger is in accordance with nature. Without anger a man cannot attain purity: he has to feel angry with all that is sown in him by the enemy. When Job felt this anger he reviled his enemies, calling them 'dishonorable men of no repute, lacking everything good, whom I would not consider fit to live with the dogs that guard my flocks' (cf. Job 30:1, 4. LXX). He who wishes to acquire the anger that is in accordance with nature must uproot all self-will, until he establishes within himself the state natural to the intellect." - St. Isaiah the Solitary

--------------

Overcoming Obstacles To Receiving God's Grace

--------------

Saints Anthony, John, and Eustathius of Lithuania

--------------

How John Often Felt In His Marriage

Video: The Finale of "The Dead" by James Joyce

--------------

At Least Give Your Daughter A Good Example

St. Seraphim, the Virgin and Martyr

At the Judgment, its not what you would do for the sake of your children that will count, but how you lived your life in your toughest moments.

--------------

"I'm walking through a wasted land
I'm walking through a wasted land
Where is the future we planned
I'm walking through a wasted land." - Richard Thompson

--------------

"If I had not destroyed myself completely, I should
not have been able to rebuild and shape myself again." - Abba Alonius

--------------

“Some people change when they see the light, others when they feel the heat.” - Caroline Schoeder

--------------

"Sometimes being a bitch is all a woman's got to hold on to." — Stephen King in Dolores Claiborne

--------------

"Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this, too, was a gift." - Mary Oliver

--------------

"True love always seeks ways to make up not break up."

--------------

"Hearts will never be practical until they are made unbreakable." - The Wizard of Oz

--------------

"If there are some men you hate and some you neither love nor hate, and others you love strongly and others again you love but moderately, recognize from this inequality that you are far from perfect love. For perfect love presupposes that you love all men equally." - St. Maximos the Confessor

--------------

You Divorced Your Loving Husband. Now Don't Let God Divorce You!

"Attend to yourself, lest something destructive divorce you from the love of God, and dwell in your heart. And do not become listless, saying, 'How shall I guard her (the heart), since I am a sinful person?' For when a person puts aside one’s sins and turns around to God, that person’s repentance rebirths one and makes all things new." - St. Isaiah the Solitary

--------------

That We Should Be Thankful When Others Point Out Our Failings and Passions

"A person should search within, and discover his failings and defects on his own. But especially when others point them out, he shouldn't react badly; but - rather - accept it gladly and be grateful. One may believe that he sees and knows himself well; but he may be seeing himself as he would like to be, and not as he really is." - Elder Paisios the Athonite

--------------

Of Course I Know Better Than To Do Something Out of Resentment. Thats Not What This Is About.

"No one heals himself by wounding another." - St. John Chrysostom

--------------

A Final Word For Dora

"Knowing all these things then, make the first advance to a brother; lay hold of him before he has entirely shrunk away from you; and should it be necessary, to run through all the city on the same day; should it be necessary to go beyond the walls, or to take a long journey; still leaving all other things that may be in hand, attend only to this one work of reconciling your brother." - St. John Chrysostom

--------------

John and Dora Together on YouTube

Did Jesus Resurrect from the Dead? - The John Ankerburg Show

--------------

"And as I climb into an empty bed
Oh well... Enough said." - The Smiths


And I remain,

The Man That You Fear








Dora Beig Danville Jabbar Beig Dora Gaizutis